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提升托福写作的终极秘诀是什么?——仿写

在本人教学的这几年中，常常遇到刚接触国外考试的学生抱怨说，在写作的过程中不知道如何提升说理部分的逻辑性，如何举出恰当的例子，以及如何完善词句方面的搭配。

其实，这个问题很简单。我们可以回想一下自己小的时候是如何学习中文的。在两三岁时，虽然我们并没有参加任何形式的中文课程，但是照样能够学会如何正确地说中文。 那是因为，我们周围会有父母和其他亲戚以各种形式做着『示范』，这种示范会潜移默化地影响着我们的语言系统，而小时候我们强大的『模仿』能力，会促使我们快速地吸收、积 累并应用周围正确的中文知识。所以，中文自然而然成为了 我们语言体系中流利的母语。

语言的学习规律是相通的。有了正确的『输入』，才能 有正确的『输出』。所以，要想在英文写作中有所提高，我 们可以借鉴一些上乘的范文，对其思路、结构、语言等进行模仿，并最终应用在我们自己的文章中。这个过程就叫做『仿写』。

如何做仿写?

Step 1 通读范文，了解通篇大意，仔细研究各段构思。

在教学过程中，我会为学生甄选符合国外考 试评分标准的优秀范文。学生拿到这些范文后，可以从宏观的角度了解作者对于题目的观点，是采用了单边、双边还是中立的角度来进行论证。学生还可以从微观的角度，深度分析每个主体段，作者是如何通过有逻辑地说理，并配以恰当具体的例子，来证明此段的分论点。

以下为范⽂段落实例：

Modern society places a lot of emphasis on success. Though success is clearly desirable, Ithink our intense focus on success is unhealthy and counter productive.People would be better served by learning how to adopt a positive attitude towards failure.

Step 2 学习优秀的语言点

针对每一篇范文，我会为学生总结出其中用法得到的词组和句式，并让学生趁热打铁，强化对这些语料的记忆。这种从整体中提取，呈现成个体的形式，会让学生对这些语料的印象更加深刻。

以下为提取实例：

1、place emphasis on =emphasize 强调，注重

2、counterproductiveadj. 事与愿违，适得其反的

3、sb. be better served对某人有益

serve sb. well 对某人有帮助，有作用

. hope this “punching-in” approach willcontinue to serve you well in the days to come.

4、adopt attitude towards… 对...采取某种态度

Step3 大声朗读，并填入语言点 在进行完前两步之后，我会将范文中优秀的语言点删除，并在相应的位置以填空的形式呈现。学生需要将刚刚记忆过的语言点再次填入文章段落中。这种从个体再回归到整体的过程，会再次强化学生对于语言点及其语法的印象。

以下为实例：

Modern society _____________(关注) success.Though success is clearly desirable, I think our intense focus on success isunhealthy and _______(反作用的，适得其反). _______(人们能获得更多好处) bylearning how to __________(对…采取积极的态度) failure.

Step 4 打开电脑，看着中文提纲，原义输出

接下来的步骤，是仿写过程中最核心的部分。由于大多数学生在初期学习写作的过程中，都是在头脑中想出中文， 再翻译成英文。所以，我们可以模拟这种过程。我将范文翻译成中文版本，然后让学生看着中文，翻译英文。在翻译的过程中，学生会按照之前三个步骤中学习到的语言点及其呈现的形式，主动模仿，写出一篇完整的文章。

这种从无到有的过程，会极大地增强学生的自信心，同时也再次强化了对于之前优秀语言点的学习成果。

以下为中文翻译实例：

现代社会很注重成功。显然人人都想获得成功，但我觉得太关注成功是不健康的而且会适得其反。人们通过学习对失败采取积极的态度会让他们受益更多。

Step 5 对照范文，查漏补缺

每个学生在第4步中翻译出来的英文版本，一般都与范文有些出入。所以，在最后一步中，学生除了可以给老师检查之外，还可以对照第一步中的完整范文，自行查看自己文章中出现的单词拼写、语法错误，以及是否应用了之前学过的优秀语言点。

以下是校正实例：

综上，仿写可以使学生通过『模仿』，学习到正确的文章构思方式，结构的类型，以及优秀的语言点。此外，仿写的整个过程也是通过让学生不断地重复使用这些语言点，达到吸收以及内化的效果。与此同时，学生通过仿写这种从无到有的过程，可以打破对于写作的恐惧，增强自信心，加深对于国外写作考试的理解，切实提高写作功底。

托福写作范文：强制上课还是有选择性上课

Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.

Some people think that university students should be able to choose whether to go to classes or not. I could not disagree more with this idea. Even though students can have excused absences, for example, when they are sick or have something emergent to attend to, generally they should be required to go to classes. In fact, attending classes has many advantages, three of them most important: learning from the teacher, interacting with classmates, and developing responsibility.

Attending classes has the benefit of receiving the best that a teacher can offer. Good teachers review the difficult and key points of the material in the course textbook. The best teachers do more than this. They conduct group discussion of the material, and present alternative points of view on the same issue. This increases students' real understanding and critical thinking. Moreover, teachers supplement the textbook material with information provided by guest speakers, which further enhances students' understanding. All this implies that, if students are absent from class, it is tantamount to forfeiting their right to full benefits of teacher-guided learning in class.

Going to classes also helps students learn how to work with their classmates. In class, students need to put forward their ideas. They have to take questions from their classmates and when their classmates have a different point of view, they have to defend their own. All this is conducted in a friendly manner. Interaction of this kind teaches students about how to work with other people.

Finally, going to classes enables students to develop responsibility. Having to finish all the assigned readings before class helps prepare them for getting a job. So does requirement of being punctual for class. Similarly, having to complete assignments on time for class helps them to foster responsibility.

Admittedly, students can obtain information from books, but they benefit a great deal more when they go to classes. They have the advantage of learning from their teacher, of interacting with other people, and of developing the responsibility required of a good worker as well as a good student. If these skills in life are in no sense optional, how can attending classes in a university be optional?

原文来源：哈佛20篇

托福范文解析

1. Attending classes has the benefit(好处=advantages) of receiving the best that a teacher can offer.

上课有能够接收最好的老师提供信息的好

2. Good teachers review the difficult and key points(重点) of the material in the course textbook.

好老师复习课本材料上的重难点

3. The best teachers do more than(不仅)this.

最好的老师不仅做这些。

4. They conduct group discussion(进行小组讨论)of the material, and present alternative(不同的)points of view(观点)on the same issue.

他们对材料进行小组讨论，并且对同一问题提出不同观点。

5. This increases students' real understanding and critical thinking(批判性思维).

这会增加学生的真正理解和批片性思维。

6. Moreover(而且=furthermore，表示递进关系), teachers supplement(补充) the textbook material with information provided by guestspeakers(done做后置定语), which further enhances(提升，促进=improve) students' understanding.

而且，老师会用客座教授提供的信息对课本材料进行补充，这会进一步提升学生的理解。

7.All this implies(暗示，说明=indicates) that, if students are absent(缺席的)from class, it is tantamount(相等的)to forfeiting(剥夺) their right to full benefits of(发挥...的好处)teacher-guided(老师引导的，students-centered学生中心的)learning in class.

所有的这些意味着，如果学生缺席课堂，这等同于剥夺他们发挥老师引导的课堂的好处。

8. Going to classes also helps students learn how to work with(与...合作) their classmates.

上课也会帮助学生学会如何与同学合作

9. In class, students need to put forward(提出) their ideas. 在课堂上，学生需要突出他们的观点。

10.They have to take(have to do不得不/必须做sth) questions from their classmates and when their classmates have a different point of view, they have to defend(辩护)their own.

他们必须接受来自同学们的问题而且danger他们的同学有不同观点时，他们必须为自己的观点辩护。

11. All this is conducted(做)in a friendly manner. Interaction of this kind(这种互动)teaches students about how to work with other people.

这种互动教给学生如何与他人合作

12. Finally,going to classes enables students to develop(enable sb to do sth使某人能做某事)responsibility.

最后，上课使学生能够培养责任心。

13. Having to finish all the assigned(布置的)readings before class helps prepare them for getting(prepare sb for doing为sb做sth做准备)a job.

必须在上课前完成布置的阅读帮助他们为将来找到工作做准备。

14. So does(so does/do...，...也是) requirement of being punctual for(准时...) class.

课堂准时的要求也是如此

15.Similarly, having to complete assignments on time(punctually) for class helps them to foster responsibility(=develop responsibility).

同理，必须按时完成课堂作业帮助他们培养责任心

16. Admittedly(诚然，表示让步关系), students can obtaininformation(获得信息，obtain=gain=acquire) from books, but they benefit(v.受益) a great deal(许多) more when they go to classes.

诚然，学生可以从书本上获得信息，但是当他们去上课的时候，他们获益更多。

17. They have the advantage(=benefit)of learning from their teacher, of interacting with other people, and of developing the responsibility required of a good worker(后置定语)as well as(=and，也)a good student.

他们有向老师学习，和其他人互动和培养一个好员工所需的责任心的好处。

18. If these skills in life are in no sense(=not不是) optional(可选择的), how can attending classes in a university be optional?

如果这些生活技能不是可选择的，在大学上课怎么能选择呢?

托福写作范文：成功依靠勇气还是依靠运气

“When people succeed, it is because of hard work. Luck has nothing to do with success.” Do you agree or disagree with the quotation above? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position.

It is universally acknowledged that hard work is indispensable to success. Scientists toil for years before they make a major discovery. Students study for years before they are accepted by a top university. Self-made people work for a long time, even all their life before they make a fortune.(举出具体的人物) However, less well-known is the essential role that luck plays in achieving one’s goals. It is often luck that turns years of hard work into success; people discover and invent things with the help of luck, and so do they become famous and find jobs.

First, luck has helped a great number of people invent and discover things. Sir Alexander Fleming experimented with antibacterial substances for nine years before he discovered Penicillin. He went through laborious trial and error, but it was on account of luck that he looked at the mold on a piece of cheese and got the idea for penicillin there and then. Benjamin Franklin had been trying to prove his idea that lightning and electricity is the same thing, but it was only in flying a kite that he proved it and the concept of a lightning rod happened to strike him.

Also, luck helps people become famous. Let us consider young authors. Many work hard to learn to write. For example, they take writing classes. Besides, they work at menial jobs so as to survive and gain experience. Then one day a lucky writer may have a piece of writing published and attract public attention. Or the writer meets an editor at the right time and place. Years of continuous writing brings the writer to the door of success, but one lucky chance, like the shot in soccer, eventually helps him or her reap success.

Finally, luck has helped many people secure jobs. One may spend much time writing and sending resumes, reading recruiting ads, and going to job interviews. One may pound the pavement for a long time before getting a job. However, it is with luck a job hunter meets the person who will offer a position to him or her, or learns of a vacancy that is not advertised. Being at the right place at the right time often helps one land a job, and this has all to do with luck.

One can hardly succeed without hard work, but hard work without luck often leads to nothing. Luck has helped a great number of people find success. In fact, luck goes hand in hand with hard work.

托福写作范文：小说还是非小说

“When people succeed, it is because of hard work. Luck has nothing to do with success.” Do you agree or disagree with the quotation above? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position.

It is universally acknowledged that hard work is indispensable to success. Scientists toil for years before they make a major discovery. Students study for years before they are accepted by a top university. Self-made people work for a long time, even all their life before they make a fortune.(举出具体的人物) However, less well-known is the essential role that luck plays in achieving one’s goals. It is often luck that turns years of hard work into success; people discover and invent things with the help of luck, and so do they become famous and find jobs.

First, luck has helped a great number of people invent and discover things. Sir Alexander Fleming experimented with antibacterial substances for nine years before he discovered Penicillin. He went through laborious trial and error, but it was on account of luck that he looked at the mold on a piece of cheese and got the idea for penicillin there and then. Benjamin Franklin had been trying to prove his idea that lightning and electricity is the same thing, but it was only in flying a kite that he proved it and the concept of a lightning rod happened to strike him.

Also, luck helps people become famous. Let us consider young authors. Many work hard to learn to write. For example, they take writing classes. Besides, they work at menial jobs so as to survive and gain experience. Then one day a lucky writer may have a piece of writing published and attract public attention. Or the writer meets an editor at the right time and place. Years of continuous writing brings the writer to the door of success, but one lucky chance, like the shot in soccer, eventually helps him or her reap success.

Finally, luck has helped many people secure jobs. One may spend much time writing and sending resumes, reading recruiting ads, and going to job interviews. One may pound the pavement for a long time before getting a job. However, it is with luck a job hunter meets the person who will offer a position to him or her, or learns of a vacancy that is not advertised. Being at the right place at the right time often helps one land a job, and this has all to do with luck.

One can hardly succeed without hard work, but hard work without luck often leads to nothing. Luck has helped a great number of people find success. In fact, luck goes hand in hand with hard work.